| ....~....troubled...~..
....the younger one smiled at me...~...and stretched out his arms...."bao bao"....~...
...the older one...tugged at my shorts and reached for my hands...~...even though both my hands are soiled with charcoal...~..
...its like a bond is established in just a split second...~...
...both are amazingly adorable..~...
...they need to grow up in the right environment....~.....for now...its simply not happening...~..
...~...i feel tired...~....i told myself that the line has to be drawn somehow....certain things must change..~..
....but somehow or rather...~...the kids are pulling me back..~...
...its a contradicting feeling..~..
...wat do i do?...rather....what can i do?....
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| ...hmm...~..i've been dreaming alot these days...~..
...and the strange thing is....i can remember exactly what i was dreaming about...~...in fact...its so realistic...so real....that i can literally feel myself in my dreams...~..somehow or rather....subconsciously....i can control what to say and what to do...~....
...this is getting kinda scary..~...omg...~...
...i need to read up on dreams....~...
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| ...just came back from my cousin's wedding dinner...~...
...in the past...~...a wedding celebration will always fill me with emotions...~...there and then....i will just ponder and visualize how my own wedding will be in the future...~..
...how things have changed...~..
...~...now....~...im just so numbed to it..~..
...i guess getting married is no longer important to me..~..
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| ..原本应该开心的一天.....到头来又被打回原型..~....
....我真是一个白痴...~....大笨蛋....傻瓜.....~....
...我又何必一直担心着你呢?....~......
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| ...今天心情好了许多...也许是因为心中的一结终算打开了...~...
...这几天也开始"做工"了...感觉松了一口气...~...
...希望这种心情能延迟下去...~...
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...你的身体状况始终让我非常担忧...~...虽然你常常表现得很坚强...~..但是我却了解你心中的疲倦...~....你不能再继续这样的生活了.....
...我原本已想尝试慢慢的离开你...但是你那简单的短讯....~..却又融化了我的心灵...~...既然躲不开，放不下，也摆脱不了....~.....
....~...我还是会继续做你身后的专属天使...~...
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